abel’s home

Archive for March, 2009

Guy supplies

Baby women have purses. Baby men have dump trucks. Really they’re the same thing with slightly different functionality. Both purses and dump trucks are made to put stuff in for the purpose of transport. But honestly dump trucks are one thing that make me so happy I’m a baby-man. If I had to carry a purse, I’d have to be pretty, forfeit the dumping capability, and carry instead of drive. Ladies, I have nothing against you or purses. I’m just made for dump trucks, that’s all.

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Plus, I’ve never seen a purse that can carry something as hefty as Leroy. I have a feeling that if I needed a break from walking, my dump truck could even handle my weight.

Fun Fact: Muscles weigh more than fat. That’s why people who look like me are heavier than people who look like Leroy. Look, I’m not calling Leroy fat. I’m just saying that I’m heavier. So, maybe I’m saying Leroy is fat. Or, maybe I’m saying that I’m extremely muscular. Bottom line, I’m not saying anything. I respect my readers enough to let you draw your own conclusions.

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Giggles

May I present for you my new motivational presentation – “The Growth of a Smile is the Growth of a Community.” The following pictures are simply the slides that I use when I give my speech in person. Right now I will only give you a quick summary. Between you and me, this presentation has nothing to do with communities. But that title sure does sound impressive so I decided to include it in my studies.

1. Sometimes everyone is trying to make me giggle and/or smile, and I just don’t feel goofy. Communities are like that sometimes.

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2. But, I love the people around me, and the luvey in me gives me the energy to give it my best shot. In my experience communities are like that.

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3. Then I realize, baby-man Abel, there’s more to smile about than what that little guy shows. Beef it up. So, even though it’s still a little forced, I do give it two times more oomf. Communities have oomf.

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4. Before I know what’s happening I have a thunderous giggle rise up from my little pinky piggie *wee wee wee all the way to my laugher. Communities often include piggies.

*Unknown author. This Little Piggie Went to the Market.

Please note my use of sources. This speech is the real deal. If you wish to book me for your next motivational get together, please contact Mommy for scheduling and availability.

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Man stuff

Baby man I might be, but some things still intimidate me. If you’re a lady, you probably think that all men are born knowing how to fix cars. That’s only half true. Most car things really are second nature. For example, changing a tire. No one has ever taught me, but how hard could it be? But, then there’s the harder things like fixing your car’s songs and special noises. I’m not afraid to be vulnerable and say that I needed to submit to my daddy’s superior manness on this one.

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I gotta say, this one was a toughy. Even my daddy had to look around before we found the bottom of the problem. We popped the hood and even looked underneath in the oily and dirty section. Nothing. But, don’t be alarmed, we eventually figured it out, and now my car is singing perfectly again.

That’s one small step for babies, and one giant leap for baby-men.

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